connected together

The words ‘closeness’ and ‘intimacy’ are often used interchangeably, but they are quite different. Closeness is about comfort. It’s low-risk, low anxiety, predictable, familiar. Closeness is necessary in all relationships, however, closeness without intimacy is simply a relationship that has an unspoken contract to just die together. Intimacy is about risk-taking, newness, unpredictability, spontaneity, and high anxiety. Intimacy means you have a relationship with your partner; closeness means you have a relationship with your thoughts of your partner. All intimacy and no closeness is impossible to sustain, but there needs to be a mix of the two.